5. Journalism

Wednesday, March 4th 2009.

My stupid doctor said I have to keep this journal. I don’t know why, I’m not hearing voices or suicidal or any of that shit. Besides, Journals are for girls. Did you ever see a G.I. Joe journal? No, you only see Barbie and Kim Possible journals because JOURNALS ARE FUCKING GAY

The list says I should talk about my day or something equally queer, but It never says anything about telling the truth. So, now I’m a 6’4′, built, star quarterback, and can get any girl in school to instantly go down on me. So when I asked Martha to a party this weekend, of course she begged yes (or maybe she begged ME.) She smiled and bend her left leg slightly as she twisted a piece of her bleach blonde hair. Watermelon bubble gum mixed with Hollister perfume drifted around her.

So that’s what really happened, not the lame truth. I didn’t stumble into the band geeks knocking over a tuba. I wasn’t intercepted by her boyfriend, the captain of the football team. And he certainly didn’t dump a carton of milk on my head.

After all, that would be a little too cliché.

Friday, March 6th 2009

I hate that fagot! Tyler did it to me again, I wasn’t even looking at Jessica! We where at lunch and she was wearing that short denim skirt that Megan Fox wears in Transformers, I mean, come on, every guy in the school was staring at her, even the teachers!

Anyway so I was just siting there talking to Jimmy minding my own business when Tyler walks up behind me and dumps a carton of milk on my head. The teachers don’t even care! Fagot Mr Stone probably has the hots for him.

And why? Tyler’s not the caption of the football team, fuck, we don’t even have a football team. He doesn’t play any sports. At least I’m on the baseball team. But no, all the girls want Tyler, the prick. He’s failing his classes, when he even shows up. Today he slept though Math, Mr Stone didn’t even try to wake him up.

I’ve got to do something to get back at him.

Monday, March 9th 2009

Before anyone else asks, it was worth it. I fucking got Tyler suspended or worse. He decked me right before the police escorted him out of school. He knew it was me, but he can’t prove it and the police don’t care.

Over the weekend Jimmy and I got Tyler’s number and email for his blackberry storm (rich prick.) It took a while but we managed to hack into his email and we set it to ring his phone whenever he got a new message. Jimmy setup a script that would post his email and phone number to the internet during Math. We weren’t sure what would really happen.

Half way though class Tyler’s phone went crazy. Mr Stone was pissed, he took the phone and checked the messages. His face lit up like a cherry tomato! He grabbed Tyler by the arm and dragged his sleepy ass to the office. When the principal checked it the phone was full of porn. And not the normal type of porn that people really watch, but like twisted Japanese tentacle anal she-male shit.

The whole class was listening outside of the office, the principal was screaming at him. When Tyler cam out of the office we all where laughing at him. He looked like a beat dog. The police officer was escorting him out when he hit me. This girl from my class, Susan stopped to help me up.

Wednesday March 11th 2009

So that script Jimmy made, the one to post Tyler’s number on the internet, he never did it! Tyler really did have all that shit on his phone! Jessica’s been telling all the girls around school of all the weird shit he made her do, like making her wear a strap-on so he could give her head.

Susan, the girl that helped me Monday, she gave me her ICQ, she even sat with me at lunch today!

The funny thing is, I’d never noticed her before Monday.

© Chris Richards 2009